and my experiences inform that growth
Living half of my life
in chronic
pain
is just one example
of many experiences
I never anticipated
I fantasized about
dreamed of
prayed for
wished for
death
more times then I will
ever admit to
Anything to quell my suffering
silence my pain
hide my fear
KILL THE TURBULENCE INSIDE OF ME
But every day I live
I know that living is teaching me
gratitude
happiness
forgiveness
And I am
grateful
and happy
and I can forgive all the suffering
because surviving it has afforded me
life
and
in all its fragility
it often
hurts
*****************************************
Twenty years ago I experienced
for the first time
the cultural phenomena of losing someone so special to you
who also happens to be
a total stranger
They found him three days later
my mom was the first to call me.
I reacted
the way I felt I should react
the only way
I knew how
Honestly
Sometimes
people feel things
and it makes other people
uncomfortable
Sometimes
people feel things
and others
understand and support
you
My mother is an example of the latter.
Here is a poem she wrote for me twenty years ago:
Here is a poem she wrote for me twenty years ago:
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